Rhod Gilbert on BBC Radio Wales.

If you are listening to this, you are listening to Rhod Gilbert's Best Bits podcast, the best bits of the Saturday morning show, live on BBC Radio Wales. This week, it's me, Chris Corcoran, in for Rhod, with / Goldie Lookin Chain / street philosopher, Eggsy.

Now, Eggsy, um, back to the ... the ... the sporting / kicked off with / Yes, / which is, of course, ... because / Wales slammed France last night / now, England / through this / Right. / it's really easy / should be fine / OK. Go on. / I'm just a little bit sceptical on a result / result / obsession with Planet of Apes / ghost and stuff / all that kind of stuff / I love that. / So, / of rugby / Wales / good at recently / Very good. / We lost / against Ireland / brilliant against France / Right. / That means that the only team at the moment / whole t__ / ... right ? ... is / Ireland. So, England need to beat Ireland today ... / OK. / for Wales / win / we obviously want Wales / championship / because we are ... / We are Welsh / Good. I've got that right? / Well done. / and, __, therefore, we need to support / traditionally, of course, / on that well / pledge allegiance towards the English / how / way / what I'm thinking is, in that / Uri Geller way / which, presum ... / presumably / science / to do now / look at your watch and think of winning. Just think of winning now. / It's that. / do / I think we need to channel the nation's energy / positive energy / mental energy / positive / like a l__ beam / coming from / top of your head / the same / challenging / channelling my aura / very similar but slightly different, my friend / would say / channelling / slightly different, my friend / that's what Uri Geller would say / look / everything / why / we need to channel the energy of the nation to support England. / Yeah / become English / they've got their place, we've got ours / show a little bit of support / in a / friendly rival sort of way. / That's right. / reasons to support them / without ... without being / you know / English done for us / very much / Romans / Yes. / done for us / OK / so / there'll be __ two things / brainstorm of good positivity associated with / English / tea. We drink tea. / great range of cakes and d__, the English. / Yeah. / uh / I'm not too sure about that / keep focused on the positive / OK. / yeah / 'cause / people / OK / enough / as it is / イングランドが我々にしたひどいことを挙げれは、枚挙に暇がないから / yeah yeah yeah, OK.

Brainstorm. / I'll be jotting stuff down / what / ever done for us / tea is an obvious b__ / cup of tea / strong start / what else? / Um ... tea ... um ... hot drinks, uh ... what else have they done? / they didn't do ... they didn't do coffee / hot s__ is generic / given / cream / but / cream is fairly generic / specifically / f__ / massive impact on / quite / good Christmas / that's / Christmas cake / dominate / it's not particularly English / Christmas cake, is it? / uh ... OK / if anything / S__ / that's something / so far / tea / summary / Hot drinks. Well done, ... guys. / tea / there's got to be loads of stuff. There's got ... / the empire / Right. OK. / lost it / so, that was ... yeah. / So, that's gone. / No. / definitely / tea / that's top of the list / Empire is out / What's on the list so far? / OK. So, / positive / English ever done for us / tea / great one / strong start, yeah / tea / I've crossed the Empire / simply given us tea / that's good. ... Uh ... / do you know, I thought / more than this / but he's Irish / you know / they haven't given us that. ... Um ... uh ... / uh ... Graham Norton ... / Irish. / Irish? / He's Irish. / Good grief. Is that true? / Yeah. / come on. Showbiz / gotta be / big hitters / there's gotta be / great / massive ones. / Yeah. / Uh ... / Uh ... oh, football. / Yes. / __ __ ever done anything about football / this ... this ... it's on the tip of my tongue / waiting / just / come through / really given us that / great / what / done for us / amazing / Yeah? Go on / primarily / tea ... we've got tea, and ... and ... uh, there's gotta be something ... / invented / OK / stop thinking about English / throw stuff out there / Yeah, / I'll tell you / coming from / OK. / the f__ / the f__ / No. It's Australia. / OK. / right / the helicopter / helicopter / Yeah. Or aliens in, uh ... / or aliens / Egyptian, uh, pyramids / Um ... / Incas or something / Mayans got that. / Um ... OK. Um ... / Uh ... / Mobile phone / m__s. / Now ... now, the English were very good at m__s / especially during the world war two. / The RAF. ... Did they invent the m__? I don't know. / let's ... let's give them / no / OK / can't really / right the way through / since the dawn of time / yeah, beans. What about beans? Is that ... is that / that's American, isn't it? Yeah. / come on, there must be something / Oh, I got it. / Yeah? / Sarcasm.

I've been / essentially / India / enquiry / and, of course / they stole it from India / technically English. / That's off the list / breakfast tea / what we've got so far / sarcasm / which is a hard thing to get by.

I've got another one here. / Yeah? / the full English / Mmm. Now. / Oh. Now you are talking. / That is quite a good call / full English breakfast / wait a minute / where does bacon come from ? / I mean ... I mean / from the pig / yeah, but / all the pigs in the world / yeah / that's out / so / Danish / that's out / where / eggs / come from / chicken / chickens / England / Yeah. I mean / chicken technically / most places / Yeah. / Right? / so, is it really __ English? / No. And __ c__ / national bird of France / kind of French / you know / you can go with ... um ... / a bit American__ / you know __ __ __ __ I'm afraid / What __ English ever done for us? Uh ... / list / Cardiff / let's try __ out, yeah / Now, some of these are good cause__. We've got / they ... they might help / wanna / show support / send out Uri Geller positive vibes because we need / Ireland today / The Beatles / ... Yeah / like a boy band / quite popular boy band / Liverpool / it's true / It is true. / I think / OK, yeah / list / only / think of ... / Yeah? / ... is that, um, England __ essentially / group of regions / yeah / and the north / south / Exactly. So, / fighting / rugby / middle class / which is, kind of, a bit different / because, you know / for all intents and purposes / southeast / I mean, this is true. ... __ __ __ __ / we __ just / let's put / list, so far, right? / tea - crossed out / that's gone / uh ... sarcasm / Yeah, OK. / and Beatles / OK / Got another one. / Yeah / Cheryl Cole / northern / same ... same theory / OK / put her in brackets. It's something. It's something. / And there / assumed / I quite like Cheryl Cole / but I'm / sure / what massive impact / did you / did you / about Welsh nationalism / pretty quiet, really / and then she refused to be interviewed / TV / out / I'm not doing it / No, just ... / she's out / Oh, good grief / what's wrong with me? / Unbelievable / I was born like this / accept me for what I am, Cheryl / born / come on / let's park it / I'm not a monster / upset / Eggzy / Cheryl Cole / 80-pound slippers. ... I don't know / relevance / I'm already upset / memories / come flooding back / Beatles / good / Yorkshire pudding / great things __ coming from the north / it kind of points out / yeah / all along / suspicion / north / south / which / out / banging on about for ages / like / there __ lot of, like ... / pride / North / they're not nasty about it. / Do you know what I mean? / like / vibe / come in. Welcome / Yorkshire tea ... Yorkshire tea / again, it's / they don't grow it, mate. / ヨークシャー・ティーといっても、ヨークシャーで栽培してるわけじゃない / No, they don't, do they? / OK / pudding / looking for stuff from ... to support the south, which is English public-schooly rugby team / English gave you the queen." from K__ __ K__ / yeah / you see / is / foreign / German / same / Greek vibes going on there as well / so / where do we stand on that? / but / southwest / Yeah. / regional thing / basically Celtic. / Yeah. / you're right / they're virtually Welsh / or something / you know / public school / yeah, that's it / great stuff.

__ __ __ / Chris and Eggsy / Hello. / another Ask Eggsy / A__ ... good name / I am very worried having seen all these / appearing across the UK / Yes. / I was thinking about this the other day / area for you, isn't it? / good one, yes, yeah. / Uh ... "I wanna ask Eggsy, what type of alien phenomenon is this ? / is this ... / Right / is this __ sign of impending invasion / Eggsy / what I should do / protect / is / yeah / invasion / Yeah, OK / and can you tell him what he should do to protect himself? / Two theories / thinking / world / 2012 / I think / the world was going to end / yeah / part of those prophecies were, giant __holes / everywhere / they / appearing / past the sell-by date / world / 2012 / そこまでは予言どおりだったが、2012年はとっくに過ぎてしまい、言わば賞味期限が切れて / funnily enough / obviously / there are theories that aliens __ __ __ the center of the earth / Huh. / so, it could well be / coming. It could also / involve / water ... which / come / result of heavy rain / Yeah / other times / as the result of E.T.

I / squeeze another one in. Uh ... Eggsy / Someone, hi. / swimming / and, if so, any idea when __ __ be revealed / we / great question. Um ... you just wait till __ Olympic Swimming Committee / introduce the slug-swimming technique / coming / later / __ laugh / happens / have you / insight / what it's like? / pretty much / get / and just lying there. Uh ... / So / I'm guessing, is, uh, sliding over the edge of the pool ... / Yeah, / ... and slowly down the side / body comes in / And then on to the floor ? / On to the floor / perhaps the current takes you / 海流が君を運んでくれる / you know, uh, / out of oxygen. That's the Olympic level of the sport / how long / slugging / And what's the entry level / sport / people / looking / you might start off by just, sort of, uh, / wriggle a bit / and then / move on / full slugging / you are allowed to wear, uh, heavy weights in your swimming trunks / swimming costume / if you are a lady / hold / you / down / is clearly, b__s, / Do not try __ pretend to be a slug / and put weights / your trunks / water / don't do that. Don't do that / just silly / you could / slug on the sofa / do it in a dry area / in a dry area with plenty of oxygen / plenty of oxygen / at worst, / put loads / soapy stuff / slide along the __ge / lying on top of a __ is fine. But don't / unless you / Olympic-trained slugger / not / many / around / only exist in my mind.

New Zealand prime minister John Key / shape-shifting alien. / New Zealand / forced to publicly deny rumours / he is a shape-shifting alien / awesome / David __, shape-shifting repti__ ... re__ alien / humanity towards enslavement. / That's so cool. / good s__ / good human / press conference to set the record straight / key / unusual step of not only seeing a doctor but a vet and both of them confirmed I'm not a reptile / That's amazing / or a giraff at any point. Thank you very much / That's what / might / space ship / outer space / overly long either. / That's fantastic. / that is good. Uh ... do you think / phoned / are you an alien / I don't think so / in our politician__ / That's what I like. Um ... / terrific. / but if he / playing the ... um ... the joke / of course I'm not / but then / really he is / what / done / double-bluff__ / right now / probably / tentacles / chocolate / for aliens, of course / you know / Tw__ / bedroom / there could be something going on there. / If / years / he's bound to say that / Yeah. / and / also / he's destined to / enslave human population / world / humour is __ brilliant way of doing it / he's all right. He's funny / when he finishes / suit off and / bottom half / tank wheels with / top half __ __ __ __ I bet that's what he really looks like / by doing / fun little "Ho ho ho, guys, / really an alien / he's gonna destroy us all.

We / get behind the English because / Ireland / Wales to persevere in the quest to be the first nation to win three back-to-back / nations / at stake, Eggs / lords / they will / quite epic / great / mate / lords of rugby / now / how did you picture the / might be a bear as well / hind legs / on a chain / not being, uh, mistreated, though / perfectly / Lords of Rugby / behind / a speaking bear? / go, uh, go / do / guys / actual voice? / Yeah. / Hi guys / talking bear / in my / special occasions / Ian, Ian, do the voice / Oh, do I have to? / do the voice / how / guys / Thank you. They're listening now / be quite cool, actually / so, that's / Eggsy's mind / in my mind / and, for the rest of us, uh, what's / win __ championship / yes / either way / behind English / from people / let us know what you think. How / behind / Sing __ in Welsh, and / listener / OK. / That's good. / Yeah, that's pretty good. / that's good / because / song / combine / two cultures there / which is a nice touch / post-modern vibe going on there. I like it. / do we add singing / to / our list / which is, so for / evident / tea, crossed out / sarcasm / we need to make it a bit bigger. And there's not much / left / And, the trouble is, / English anyway / right / Essentially, what / history of Englishness / stolen / everything / nicked everything from everybody, yeah. / African-Americans / big / think / English / Welsh / support the miners / came to Wales quite a lot / lot to do with Wales. I think, um ... / hang on / good vibe going on here / yeah / who ... who's been to Wales / supported miners during the dark time, or whatever, so ... / there's something in that / Old Man River / brilliant / Brilliant. / yeah / Great, yeah. OK, there's something there. There's something there / you do the bear / do / stuff to ... to help during / guys. Kick that ball. __ __ __ looks like __ __ / get the ball between the middle of it / yes / French / guys. Come on. / Yes, I'm a bear.

Got some more suggestions coming in. What / ever done for us / from / OK. Yeah. / muffins / of course it is / sorry. / I ... I always ... I personally / very American thing. / Me too. Or Canadian / sorry / it doesn't quite make it to the list / how / Good / it's / northern again, isn't it? There's a lot of things / if / change / country / itself / slightly different in ... in the history of this ... this country / I think / still / true / steel front ... I mean, there is / there is a historical precedent / industrial revolution / largely, uh / Great Britain / iron works / steel works / S__ is famous / as / well / iron works / link there / but / bracket / north / so / really / no one / out there / you know / got / shirt / shoes / yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah / you know / trousers / yeah, that's it / pink shirts / is there ... is there / nothing / euro done for us / can / a lot today / but / because / exactly / from / from the rest of / stuff / get in there / talking about / anyone called Charlie, Toby, B__ / yeah, yeah yeah yeah / uh / suggested by / I quite like this idea / called / massive__ / curly hair / posh / yeah, but / imagine good stuff they've done / OK. / OK. / let's have a brainstorm now / you and me / English middle classes / what they've ever done for us / now / cause / think / so / something to do with ... like, uh ... / themselves / loads of money / tons / tons of cash / have got / this might to lead to something. Uh ... / come on / opinion / massively / opinion / stuff / massively / they've given us / I've got it / They're very friendly / English middle class__ / actually / a few wines / friend / J__ / wonderful, wonderful / almost / Welsh / they might even have a b__ / you know / like a trumpet / backyard / That's good. / the word "b__" /

Roch Ness Monster / no one / months / what / couple of things / she doesn't exist / AWOL / counter-intuitive / know / is female? / ネッシーは雌だとなぜわかる？ / good question / very / basically / just / hybernating / winter / what / name / Star Wars / after the / they / return / and in greater numbers / exactly / turn up / one day / show everybody / that's / noise / in / number / Roch Ness Monsters are easily startled, but they shall soon return, and in greater numbers / leave / stamp on everything and leave / on stuff, then disappear again.

So, what the English / ever / beat the Irish / some / quite compelling argument / put them through / filter / example / our shoulder / support / to date, our list goes ... uh ... What / English / tea, crossed out / gone / from another country / sarcasm is in / OK / they've got that / of / brackets / yeah / uh / singing / me / you doing / rugby bear / in / b__ is a great, strong ... / that ... that / quintessential Englishness there / great / good / reason / Agreed. But, really, Eggsy / list / __'ve only got three ... sarcasm / even / some / probably right / OK / first one up ... so, this is, the English gave us S__ / from / immediately / really / may be English / the value / you get from / studying / A: at all / Yeah. / B: Uh ... as a child / think / let's just / that much / uh ... / TV show S__ / OK / TV show S__ / OK / isn't real / so / I think / trying to support __ invisible man / doesn't exist / agree / couch potato / good / long term / success / all about / get up and go / TV / I'm afraid. / Yeah. / So, a couple of others, then. Um ... / here we go / some / here / argue against / from / uh, no / from / yet / OK. / C__ cheese / It's a big one. Chedder / loved / everybody / apart from / dairy issues / I think / cheese / you know, it's a bit / brand, innit? / thing / find / all inclusive, Eggs / any / people / quite right / in olden days / these days / disease / Stilton / whole array of cheese / reason / upset / this one person / dairy / upset someone / Yeah, exactly. / pies / um ... again, you know / Danish / bacon / put / just / much fat / pie / essentially / can't be / 98% fat / your face / I'm afraid / Alex / so, the subsections of other sportsm__ / who've got / English DNA and genetics / bits / you know / talking / English bits in them / Welsh rugby players / very logical / even / half of these players / not / anybody / pair / spinal c__ / score / tries / point, but I can't / know / cause they're / feel Wales / Welsh h__ge / English for that / tricky one / some classic kids TV there / classic kids TV / going / big / fan / yeah / the original / you couldn't / it is impossible to argue / for us / current / not the same / same / agree with you on that / modern / he doesn't exist / any more / different guy doing it / real / sort of / isn't / any more / whole / exist / no one knows / any more / they are now pound shops / exactly / precedent / quite / madam / French / yeah / O__ / O__ Flow / know / you / on about / none of them / English / obviously / so / know / think / flow / Ireland / on that moment alone / out / South America / exactly / rugby / know / cricket / bluh bluh / like baseball, but even slower / エグジー、クリケットって何？/ 野球みたいなものだよ。かつ、野球よりさらに進行がのろい。 / time / Welsh / happy / that / impact / key / done / rugby / all / sport / suppose / invent / ball / true / maybe / claim the glory for __self / information / did / actually / a lot of paperwork /

Bob D__ / what / ever / welsh / beat the Irish / summing / come / end / track out / Tom Jones / link / welsh / plays / No. / but / play that one / that's / out / in summary, what / beatles / too / rugby / pretended / bear / not / quite / not / just using it / turns / absolute b__ / Dutch / basically / got / sarcasm / got / behind the English / given / all / ever done for us / sarcasm. ... So, we / behind / we've really done our best / listed / into / all our brains / massive / all / all / great / thanks, guys / for helping us out / so much over the years / sarcasm / good luck / mean it / thanks / great / by / give us / callback.

And if you enjoyed that, why not listen to the whole show? / 11 till 1.

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